One more thing to be thankful for on Thanksgiving Day!
November 21, 2011 in Humor
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The Three Stooges had it figured out over 70 years ago
October 26, 2011 in Political Humor
When the kingdom of Moronica is overthrown, Moe becomes dictator with Larry and Curly as his aides. Watching it, I didn’t know whether to laugh or weep because in spite of the comedic format, it’s true for the way our own banana republic of the USA currently chooses its Presidents.
We can change all that, but not until we stop engaging in the two-party farce of the ruling class and nominate our own President from the 99%.
Here is the link to the video: You Nazty Spy http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xg_3qEf3ahU
[Suffer through the initial commercial. It's worth it.]
AntiChrists are appearing on the scene faster than Santa Claus in December
September 27, 2011 in Humor
I just read in Huff Post that a heckler Monday night from the crowd at House of Blues in Los Angeles stood up and called President Obama the AntiChrist. [How did this guy get into the House of Blues? If I were Obama, I would be firing some of my security people.] The article didn’t mention if the man was part of the paid entertainment or not, but Obama as the AntiChrist is sure to be one of the featured sideshows of 2012 that will be sponsored by the Perry campaign and its evangelical Dominionist faction [and yes, Perry will be the Republican challenger].
It was only a few days prior that I read an article in Ahram online where some Egyptians were calling Hosni Mubarak the AntiChrist and even predicting that the world was going to end yesterday [Monday Sept. 26, 2011].
2012 promises to be the Greatest Show on Earth. Already we have AntiChrists popping up all over the world. Then 2012 is the year we elect a President here in the USA. We have the world on the brink of financial collapse because Wall Street continues to hoard money that doesn’t even belong to them in the first place–and if you think it does, then you don’t understand the first thing about the shell games that these people have pulled and continue to pull on the American people.
And last, but not least of all, we have the end of the Mayan Calendar. No doubt throughout the year of 2012 in the USA there will be numerous groups going off into the desert to wait for the rapture. We can only hope that they will take a few of the political candidates with them and then not do a headcount when they all pile back into their cars to return to work on Monday morning.
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Calling an American President or any world leader “the AntiChrist” is not exactly original. Every single US President of the 20th and 21st century has at one time or another been called the AntiChrist. Obama will have to get in line behind all the rest of them.
Maybe we are all in hell and no one has told us yet.
Shhhhhhhhhhhhhh! It’s top secret!
September 23, 2011 in Humor
Only you and 4.2 million others know the secret. Secrecy News reports that more than 4.2 million people have access to classified government information, with more than 1 million holding top secret clearances. The number is far higher than expected and marks the first time the government has tallied the number of clearances for federal employees and contractors.*
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*IfLizWereQueen: I can see why. The truth makes them look ridiculous! Freud is often quoted as saying: ”There are no jokes.” We may need to create an addendum: ”Except for secrets.”
Happy First Day of Fall 2011!
September 23, 2011 in Humor
The equinox occurs when the Earth’s position on its axis places the sun directly over the Earth’s equator. Day and night are of approximately equal length at 12 hours each.
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Report on the Infernal Egguinox from Snopes
Claim: A special property of the equinox allows eggs to be balanced on their ends that day.
False: Every year on the vernal equinox and the autumnal equinox–the two days per year in which the length of day and night are the same, we hear about a magical property of this day that allows eggs to be balanced on end. The truth is that eggs can be balanced on end any day of the year.
Despair, Incorporated: it’s always darkest before it goes pitch black
August 31, 2011 in Humor
Justin Sewell
His business may really be booming if Rick Perry is elected President.
If you are looking for slogans and homilies like “Change your thoughts and your change your world,” don’t bother to visit Despair, Incorporated.
Urban cowgirl, Ruth Pennebaker wrote a great piece in the Texas Observer two months ago (July 1, 2011 issue) on the founder of this Austin, Texas company.
Justin Sewell and his identical twin brother Jef and Lawrence Kersten founded Despair in 1998. The company gets its inspiration from Successsories– a company that sells poster with captions such as “Live Boldly.”
Don’t look for those kinds of posters at Despair, Inc. however. For example, one of their signature posters proclaims: ”nothing says ‘you’re a loser’ more than owning a motivational poster about being a winner.”
“Never underestimate the stupidity of people in large groups” is one of my favorites.
Toddy Burton of The Austin Chronicle also wrote a good piece on Despair, Inc. back in 2006. When :-( =$
Of course, for the real thing, there is nothing like visiting the source:
Despair, Inc.
There you will find many posters appropriate for sending to your elected officials in Washington, DC
For example, since most of our elected officials would better be described as “consultants for Wall Street” instead of “representatives of the people,” may I suggest this poster:
What it might look like if David Koch told the Truth about the Keystone Pipeline
August 24, 2011 in Political Humor
A David Koch Press Release from a Parallel Universe of what it might look like if David Koch told the truth.
Obama’s latest declaration of himself as a “Blue Dog Democrat” brings him a little closer to what’s good for Koch Industries and a win/win political situation for me and my brother Charles. Win/Win for us is defined as Zero Point–that place on the political map where it makes no difference whether Perry wins or whether Obama wins because both of them will give me what I want.
More important to me at the moment than the 2012 election is Obama’s approval of the Keystone XL pipeline. Obama’s approval of that pipeline will indeed be a Koch Brothers triumph. It will put billions of dollars into my pockets. Koch Industries is responsible for close to 25 percent of the oil tar sands crude that is imported into the United States, and we are one of the biggest refiners of Alberta oil sands crude oil. Our Pine Bend Refinery in Minnesota currently processes roughly 25% of the tar sands fuel imports to the United States. We also own Flint Hills Resources, LLP, in Calgary, Canada, which is “among Canada’s largest crude oil purchasers, shippers and exporters.
Then our Corpus Christi refinery is positioned near the end of the proposed Keystone XL pipeline and would be a potential buyer for the tar sands crude shipped through the pipeline. You may remember back in 2000 our Corpus Christi company faced a 97-count federal indictment charging it with concealing illegal releases of 91 metric tons of benzene, a known carcinogen, from its refinery . The company faced liability for three hundred and fifty million dollars in fines, and four Koch employees including me faced up to thirty-five years in prison. But then George was elected and after he became president the U.S. Justice Department dropped 88 of the charges. Two days before the trial, John Ashcroft settled for a plea bargain, in which we pled guilty to falsifying documents. All major charges were dropped, we settled the lawsuit for a fraction of the original amount.
Now that’s how I like to do business so you can see why I’m still leaning toward Rick, in spite of Obama’s latest declaration of himself as a Blue Dog. Rick understands the meaning of the word “freedom”. For example, in the state of Texas I’m been so free to pollute with impunity that Texas now ranks as the highest-emitting state or province in the world for CO2 emissions,producing 290 million tons of the greenhouse gas per year.
I want the freedom to pollute and spoil the entire United States of America–from the Grand Canyon to the Appalachian Trail; from Yellowstone to the Gulf stream waters. This land is my land–not your land because I can afford to buy any President I want.
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Where does it all end folks? It ends with you and me–the 80%’ers. We are the ones with the power of our votes to write the ending to this story. But first we need a candidate–a real candidate who will represent the 80% instead of the 1% like David Koch.
Random thoughts about the D.C. Quake
August 23, 2011 in Political Humor
It wasn’t enough that a rare strong earthquake with a magnitude of 5.3 hit Colorado last night, a whopping 5.9 magnitude earthquake hit D.C. about 2 pm today. First thing I thought: ”I’m glad I don’t watch the TV pundits anymore because if I did, I know the routine for tonight. They will all be talking about where they were when it hit. That’s what people do after an earthquake–unless you live in California (and I did for 12 years). On the west coast it has to be at least a 6.2 before people even notice it.
But since it’s the East Coast, viewers might be hearing something like this from Chris Matthews tonight:
You know, you’ve heard that Ge scripted informercial for capitalism rolling out of his mouth, even if you only occasionally flip channels across the NBC/MSNBC spectrum [In the speech Matthews is referencing Obama]. “. . . I don’t think that you can say that in Japan or in China, you can’t come those those countries and become Chinese….and look where he is.”
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I can hear those keyboards clicking as the preachers crank out some good ole Armageddon, end-times sermons for prayer meeting this Wednesday and next Sunday: Give me all your money. You are not going to be needing it anyway since the world is ending tomorrow.
Rev. Harold Camping from Oakland CA, prophet extraordinaire, points out that his predictions made back in May came true today. He managed to make a complete sentence before falling asleep again.
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And of course with all this discussion of American exceptionalism, earthquakes, end-times, we can’t leave without mocking the Mayans. How could those people possibly predict the end of the world with a calendar that looks like a badly designed dinner plate?
Shades of Saddam–Where is Gaddafi?
August 22, 2011 in Political Humor
At last we have a perfect working model of the US Government!
August 20, 2011 in Political Humor
